As my mother said on April 19, 1980, at 10:35 a.m., (and not even to my face), “All he knows is baseball and a few…facts of history…and NOTHING ELSE.”
To his endless credit, my brother, who she was talking to and at, snapped, “You know that’s not true.”
“Then why does he do these things?” she cried out, referring to the offense I had committed that led her to say that. I had not held a telephone the way she wanted me to, while making a call. She grabbed at it to make me “hold it right,” I thought she wanted to talk to my father, so I handed it to her, she said a few words, stormed off in fury, and spouted that unforgettable sentence.
She was a borderline narcissist who manipulated our family’s emotions by dropping hints about suicide.
She enjoyed berating everyone she met, and finishing up the flogging with a little harsh, sarcastic, turn of the knife, something she was expert in.
One time I asked her why she constantly used sarcasm, and her retort was “It’s very common in England!”
For once, Dad stood up to her, looking up from his newspaper, saying quietly but loudly enough for all to hear, “Not in the United States.”
Before she died, I asked her why she was so harsh on people, and she said, “Can you accept that I was in a terrible depression for 20 years?” I pointed out that she had once demanded that I provide her with “a reason to live.”
“No,” I said. “You studied philosophy in college. If those bigshots couldn’t give you a reason to live, how the hell was I supposed to?”
She didn’t have an answer.
I wrote about this in a Substack post: “Mathematics and Me.” Read that. I don’t want to rehearse it again. It’s painful enough.
Isn't this interesting. It's now turning into a group therapy session. Mary, look what you are accomplishing! We are coming togerther and helping each other.
I grew up with a father who believed in the old school. Use the "belt". It hurt, but though it stung I remembered that one could take punishment and bounce back in life. It makes for courage. I remember the tears, but I also remember getting back up. This is who I am today.
The last time I disciplined her, she was in the fourth grade. Now she’s 27 and puts me in my place.
She also earns six figures, works at home with full benefits, has great moral gyroscopes, mans the soundboard in her Unitarian Church, climbs rock walls, and quilts.
I am sick and tired of this entire political mess. My entries are being deleted because a friggen nazi is on my case and I just don't care that much like fighting at this point. Maybe after the holiday. So, everyone be safe and have the happiest 4th ever. We have a wonderful America, and we want to keep it that way and not let that sob get away with his crap!
The high and mighty UNHOLY 9 sit on their thrones and feel they have nothing to lose so frig America. We'll show who's boss! We make the rules. Deal with it. The UNHOLY 9 have no conscience. They are soulless. They are selfish. They DO NOT belong speaking on behalf for the America people.
Kiwi, I am so very upset. I do believe that the Supreme Court is death to America and they are the Unholy 9. But what can be done about it? I am very distraught.
That is a great story . In many ways i feel sorry for the old time players . they would make in a year what bench sitters now make in a day /As for Willie and others in the negro league all they endured was unthinkable . Couldn't go into many places to eat . Hearing the n word all the time .Ye for their love of baseball they kept playing ,They are indeed what baseball is suppose to be .Thank you Willie . and thank you kiwi , great post
The only reason old-timers were so badly paid was because of the “Reserve Clause” in the standard baseball contract.
That enabled teams to renew a contract for the following year. And the year after that. And the year after that. And the year after that.
In 1975, two pitchers, Dodgers star Andy Messersmith and the Expos’ Dave McNally, said they would not accept that renewed year. McNally was retiring anyway to run the family car lot, but Messersmith was a top-flight pitcher. He wanted a long-term deal with the Dodgers, so that they could not trade him.
Under the player-management contract that Players’ Union leader Marvin Miller worked out with owners already, this contract dispute had to go to a three-man panel: Miller, the owners’ John Gaherin, and independent arbitrator Peter Seitz.
Gaherin backed management (of course). Miller backed the players (of course). Seitz, a highly-skilled arbitrator, pointed out how there was no specific language in the individual players’ contract that said the one-year renewal meant forever. It jus said, “One year.”
In a situation where language in a contract causes that kind of dispute, it has to go against the side that drew up the contract, for failing to make it crystal clear. The owners wrote that contract.
So they lost. They had basically said, “You can’t rule against us. We’re baseball.”
Seitz had no alternative but to find for the players. That opened up free agency, and teams had to start paying players more money.
The owners — as was their right — fired Seitz a few minutes after he issued the decision, and sued in the courts. They were laughed out. They could not sue because an arbitrator had done his job.
I love every word of this. No one like Willie Mays. (And I was raised in Brooklyn in the 1950s). Baseball. As close to heaven as many of us will ever get.
Thanks, Kiwi. I still have some fight left in me because I still believe that this is the most spectacular country on the planet. For those who don't think so, just leave!
This piece is fantastic! Such fascinating tidbits about so many different things! As a kid with parents who met in SF, the Giants were our "family team" I remember listening to Giants games on the radio, such a wonderful memory you evoked, Thank you! RIP Orlando Cepeda, this week has not been kind. 💔
I can hear the passion but yet sadness in your voice as you wrote this article. Not everyone knows the OG baseball players, I don't know the Greats like you do, that's for sure! I'm not sure if you know the answer to this question, but what seems to be the leading cause of death for baseball players? I don't think it's old age.
When you were writing about the "whales" in the casino, I do know what they really are. I pictured orcas going in, already dressed in their black and white attire, shimmying up to the roulette tables like Great White Sharks. Then I remembered that orcas were actually from the dolphin family.
I have to confess, I only knew Willie Mays through popular culture—we were in Germany for much of the time I was growing up (Dad being in the U.S. Army and all), so pro baseball wasn't something we could watch most of the time. Reading this gives me a feel for a world that went on while Dad was Making the World Safe for Democracy, one plate of powdered eggs at a time!
I was more of a movie nerd, anyway—which is why I can tell you Francis X. Bushman was a movie star and athlete of the Silent Era (his best-known role to us now is as Messala in the 1925 BEN-HUR), and radio and television actor for the rest of his life.
The NYC Parks Department doesn't have Google? I used to know somebody (brother of a friend) who worked there, and I know he was an old movie buff like I am.
Love your writings about baseball. Such fun.
One of my two obsessions in life.
The other is history.
As my mother said on April 19, 1980, at 10:35 a.m., (and not even to my face), “All he knows is baseball and a few…facts of history…and NOTHING ELSE.”
To his endless credit, my brother, who she was talking to and at, snapped, “You know that’s not true.”
“Then why does he do these things?” she cried out, referring to the offense I had committed that led her to say that. I had not held a telephone the way she wanted me to, while making a call. She grabbed at it to make me “hold it right,” I thought she wanted to talk to my father, so I handed it to her, she said a few words, stormed off in fury, and spouted that unforgettable sentence.
I never forgot it. I never let her forget it.
Sometimes it pays not to listen to a parent.
Geez, what issues did your Mom have? Who cares how you hold a phone so long as you can speak and hear?
She was a borderline narcissist who manipulated our family’s emotions by dropping hints about suicide.
She enjoyed berating everyone she met, and finishing up the flogging with a little harsh, sarcastic, turn of the knife, something she was expert in.
One time I asked her why she constantly used sarcasm, and her retort was “It’s very common in England!”
For once, Dad stood up to her, looking up from his newspaper, saying quietly but loudly enough for all to hear, “Not in the United States.”
Before she died, I asked her why she was so harsh on people, and she said, “Can you accept that I was in a terrible depression for 20 years?” I pointed out that she had once demanded that I provide her with “a reason to live.”
“No,” I said. “You studied philosophy in college. If those bigshots couldn’t give you a reason to live, how the hell was I supposed to?”
She didn’t have an answer.
I wrote about this in a Substack post: “Mathematics and Me.” Read that. I don’t want to rehearse it again. It’s painful enough.
Samantha Smith: You say it exactly right. You anticipated my own thoughts! Very good!
Tee hee.
Thank you. I was a fighter. I guess i had some issues too, but I'm happy with the way I turned out.
Isn't this interesting. It's now turning into a group therapy session. Mary, look what you are accomplishing! We are coming togerther and helping each other.
Samantha Smith: You have a very good way of expressing succinctly core values. Looking upon your postings, I absolutely agree with you on core values.
Stay strong and keep up the fight for our core values. You earn respect and appreciation.
I grew up with a father who believed in the old school. Use the "belt". It hurt, but though it stung I remembered that one could take punishment and bounce back in life. It makes for courage. I remember the tears, but I also remember getting back up. This is who I am today.
My parents both spanked me.
I vowed never to inflict that on my daughter.
I never did.
The last time I disciplined her, she was in the fourth grade. Now she’s 27 and puts me in my place.
She also earns six figures, works at home with full benefits, has great moral gyroscopes, mans the soundboard in her Unitarian Church, climbs rock walls, and quilts.
Samantha Smith and Kiwiwriter47: Each of us has been through a Dad who belted, and all of us oppose such brutality.
I believe that a child needs nurture, love, assurance, hugs, and we need to listen to that child, for she or he has a lot to tell us.
I am sick and tired of this entire political mess. My entries are being deleted because a friggen nazi is on my case and I just don't care that much like fighting at this point. Maybe after the holiday. So, everyone be safe and have the happiest 4th ever. We have a wonderful America, and we want to keep it that way and not let that sob get away with his crap!
The high and mighty UNHOLY 9 sit on their thrones and feel they have nothing to lose so frig America. We'll show who's boss! We make the rules. Deal with it. The UNHOLY 9 have no conscience. They are soulless. They are selfish. They DO NOT belong speaking on behalf for the America people.
Kiwi, I am so very upset. I do believe that the Supreme Court is death to America and they are the Unholy 9. But what can be done about it? I am very distraught.
Dump the entire Supreme Court and start over. America deserves so much better. Rules have already been broken so break some more!
That is a great story . In many ways i feel sorry for the old time players . they would make in a year what bench sitters now make in a day /As for Willie and others in the negro league all they endured was unthinkable . Couldn't go into many places to eat . Hearing the n word all the time .Ye for their love of baseball they kept playing ,They are indeed what baseball is suppose to be .Thank you Willie . and thank you kiwi , great post
The only reason old-timers were so badly paid was because of the “Reserve Clause” in the standard baseball contract.
That enabled teams to renew a contract for the following year. And the year after that. And the year after that. And the year after that.
In 1975, two pitchers, Dodgers star Andy Messersmith and the Expos’ Dave McNally, said they would not accept that renewed year. McNally was retiring anyway to run the family car lot, but Messersmith was a top-flight pitcher. He wanted a long-term deal with the Dodgers, so that they could not trade him.
Under the player-management contract that Players’ Union leader Marvin Miller worked out with owners already, this contract dispute had to go to a three-man panel: Miller, the owners’ John Gaherin, and independent arbitrator Peter Seitz.
Gaherin backed management (of course). Miller backed the players (of course). Seitz, a highly-skilled arbitrator, pointed out how there was no specific language in the individual players’ contract that said the one-year renewal meant forever. It jus said, “One year.”
In a situation where language in a contract causes that kind of dispute, it has to go against the side that drew up the contract, for failing to make it crystal clear. The owners wrote that contract.
So they lost. They had basically said, “You can’t rule against us. We’re baseball.”
Seitz had no alternative but to find for the players. That opened up free agency, and teams had to start paying players more money.
The owners — as was their right — fired Seitz a few minutes after he issued the decision, and sued in the courts. They were laughed out. They could not sue because an arbitrator had done his job.
Owners are often incompetent fools.
I love every word of this. No one like Willie Mays. (And I was raised in Brooklyn in the 1950s). Baseball. As close to heaven as many of us will ever get.
93 years old. How blessed he was!
Incredible life. Great run.
Inspiring player and human being. I still can’t believe I met him twice.
Thanks, Kiwi. I still have some fight left in me because I still believe that this is the most spectacular country on the planet. For those who don't think so, just leave!
This piece is fantastic! Such fascinating tidbits about so many different things! As a kid with parents who met in SF, the Giants were our "family team" I remember listening to Giants games on the radio, such a wonderful memory you evoked, Thank you! RIP Orlando Cepeda, this week has not been kind. 💔
Yeah, they are my “family team,” too, only for more than a century.
I can hear the passion but yet sadness in your voice as you wrote this article. Not everyone knows the OG baseball players, I don't know the Greats like you do, that's for sure! I'm not sure if you know the answer to this question, but what seems to be the leading cause of death for baseball players? I don't think it's old age.
When you were writing about the "whales" in the casino, I do know what they really are. I pictured orcas going in, already dressed in their black and white attire, shimmying up to the roulette tables like Great White Sharks. Then I remembered that orcas were actually from the dolphin family.
I have to confess, I only knew Willie Mays through popular culture—we were in Germany for much of the time I was growing up (Dad being in the U.S. Army and all), so pro baseball wasn't something we could watch most of the time. Reading this gives me a feel for a world that went on while Dad was Making the World Safe for Democracy, one plate of powdered eggs at a time!
I was more of a movie nerd, anyway—which is why I can tell you Francis X. Bushman was a movie star and athlete of the Silent Era (his best-known role to us now is as Messala in the 1925 BEN-HUR), and radio and television actor for the rest of his life.
THANK YOU FOR CLEARING UP FRANCIS X. BUSHMAN FOR ME!!!!
I have to reach out to the New York City Parks Department on that…they ask on their web page if anyone has information about him.
I just read it myself. 🤦♂️
The NYC Parks Department doesn't have Google? I used to know somebody (brother of a friend) who worked there, and I know he was an old movie buff like I am.
Very good writing. Yes, you should be writing books on baseball.